Monday, February 28, 2005

Do you think about death?
I do.
Death signifies the end of everything, right?
The end of your realm in this world, everything abruptly stops after you're dead.
Cause when you die you lose everything you ever had.
It's that simple and poignant. Black and white.
I don't fear death.
But I don't want it just yet.
I'm not like those who try to avoid it so much; taking supplements,eating organic foods,obsessive germ-phobia like that twit in Aviator, nor trying to create some ruddy elixir to stopper death.
What is the need for those anyway?
It's not like you can avoid it actually.
It's the one common fate all peoples in this world face, dying.
So why do you keep running from it, when it will eventually catch you anyway?
What a unfulfilled life that will be.

Suicide. Another ponder.
Why do people suicide? Many reasons, much unknown.
A perfectly normal person can go suicide for no reason.
People than deem them as crazy.
Why?
Because they don't understand what motivated them to kill themselves.
Humans have always been like that. When they face something they can't fathom, they just give it a convenient title and pat themselves on the back.
It's like a shrewd form of escapism. Like cowardice.
But this will never perish, for it is impossible to figure out what goes through the victim's mind when they attempt to suicide.
Speculations, guesses, yes, but they can never hit home to what actually crosses their minds, the real reasons, etc.
Your mind is inpenetratable to anyone, and that is the greatest secret we can hide from anyone.
I'll believe I fall into this category of people who will suicide for no apparent reason.
It all lies in your way of thinking.

I'm aware I've made people worried with this entry.
Don't worry I wouldn't go end my life. At least not yet. Now that didn't help did it?
I'm still getting a kick out of life, so I'm not that silly to go play with blades or water or gas or other suicide weapons.
Just stating that I'm one of those people who may die without a reason.
It's all in your thinking la. (redundancy!)
Tralala. Have I invoked a reaction in you?
Made you sit down and think?
I hope I did. (smile.)


Secrets._GoodCharlotte

Sunday, February 27, 2005

Naruto chpt 249.
Gaara got caught!
sm,jfnlaks;gjpjieqt903=46itkplwareklle!@*!()*#0
Stupido stupido Akatsuki.

Good Charlotte's cd rocks.
It's damn nice! Fwahahaha.
Joel is hot. :D
I like their parts.

LOTR: Return of the King later at night.
:D Yays.

I vant to watch White Noise.
The rational part of me is telling me that's not a very good idea.
The irrational part fervently supports watching it.
Irrational is currently winning.
So, any takers?

Friday, February 25, 2005

Good day mate!
HAHA. Hooza!
Cough. I'm in a estactic mood today.
I think i spelled that word wrong. Ooops.
I did not take PE today, for I'm a wuss. HAHA.
Like hello 10 rounds, will permanently injure me.
Tralala. Geog test was fairly easy. HAHA. Much better than the first one.
I still don't like HumanGeog. Grrr.
Math test. BAH. The coordinate geometry qns looked very easy. Compared to the brain-killing shit they normally give us during exams and other tests.
Looked. I could do it. But that does not neccessarily mean I'll get it correct. I just hope to pass, coz' I think I lost 3 godsaken marks in Loci. Sobs.
Lit test. Horrid. Don't really know vat to write.I didnt even hit 1.5 pages of answers. Ayeeee.

LD after school. (grumbles something incoherent)
My dear turnip and broccoli went to cut hair and facial.
Pasttimes of the rich. -_-
Laughed my stomach out with Lings,Joanne&Guihe. SuePing loves MrLow. She keeps talking about him.
God it was so funny. I nearly died with the water entering my trachea.
Had some ninny digital photography course for LD. The things they do to make us entertained. Sadly, it doesn't really work.
Went around school taking stupid photos. Hahaha. SO retarded.
Later stayed in the com lab flooding people's tagboards. Jerry and me.
We were bored, you see. It was very funny though. I laughed and laughed and laughed.
Stayed back for a while with Jerry. Stoned for some time then went home.
My wonderful life.

Steamboat for dinner. Muahahhaa.:D
Sukisyo 6 is damn cracked. LOL.

1,2 step._Ciara

Thursday, February 24, 2005

I'm going to kiss the staff of Dattebayo and Inane for releasing Naruto episode 123 and Naruto manga chpt 248 respectively.
Gaara is like totally roxors in the manga. OMG HE'S SO HOT NOW.SEXY IN BLACK!
(Nosebleeds.)
AND LEE. LEEEE~ LEEEEEE~~~~ YAY. HE's BACK!!! I need some tranquilizers.
O and i'm watching this hilarious yaoi anime called Sukisyo.
It's so damn funny. My sissy loves it. HAHA. Sexeh voice of Yoru~XD
It's just so damn kuku, like a lousier version of Gravitation. HAHA.
I vant to watch Gravitation now. I re-read my reunited Gravi mangas, and I died of brain clots again. It's just so FOS. Hilary's 2nd favourite word. HAHA.
OOOo BTW HILARY IS LIKE SUCHA GOOD HIGHJUMPER. XD (dances)

AND P.O.T. My poor neglected PoT.
RIKKAI DAI FINALLY! (lovelove)
I think Kirihara is adorable. Though he's a stupid brat.
Marui's kinda cute too. His techniques made me and my sissy choke and gag to death by the sheer impossibility though. So kuku.
NIOU! ( faints)
IM LIKE SO ANNOYED COZ' THEY DIDNT DRAW HIS !SEXEH! MOLE LA.
That's the main thing that made me love him. Gahh!! (sulks)
And Yaygyuu. They made his hair purple. The gayest shade of shiny purple.
I got traumatized please. VHY IS IT PURPLE?
I think they're super-cool though. Hahaha. NiouYagyuuuu~ (goes into rabid yaoi fangirl mode)
And I feel the absolute yaoi vibes between Sanada and Yukimura.
My sissy and I were giggling like nuts coz' it's so blatant. HAHA.

Cough. I'm supposed to be studying for Lit,Geog,Math tests.
O what a diversion this is. -_-
Anyway, Math is like on coordinate geometry. The thang I cannot do.
Why? Coz' I can't read the qns and I just stare blankly.
Yikes. Dont know why, but i just cant do that topic. At all.
I like Maths. Haha really. But the flair's just not existent.
It's quite sad actually. Mourn for my failure!
Ok maybe I might not fail. MAYBE. Smth tells me that will not happen.
Geog. Rawrs. Settlements. I really don't bloody like Human Geog.
Ayee. WHEN ARE WE GOING TO STUDY PHYSICAL! (screech)


GivingUp>_SilverStein

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

We have officially declared our clique as the Kuku Veggies.
This is absolutely mortifying.
What makes it even more opprobious is that I'm enjoying every minute of this.
We were completely batty on the way to chapel.
Cough, the result of our deranged 'copulations', created:
Labbage(cabbage+lalang),
Brocsley(parsley+broccoli); which will be referred to as Bruce Lee now,
due to a acute case of miscommunications. Lack of proper infrastructure, you see.
For the rest of the hybrid concoctions, see Joee's blog. It will make you convulse with spasms.
Twitch.

OI JOEE.
Thee's sanity is very much intact, though I don't deny I have a strange sense of humour.
THE STUFF YOU WROTE IN MY LIT BK WAS TOO HILARIOUS LA. (well, to me it vas.)
Only the recipients will feel the tidal humour.
Power Rangers. Hmm. Power Rangers. T_T
Cough. Silent mode vibrating? (Dies of brain hemorrhaege.)
....tremors? WHAT ARE YOU, AN SEISMOMETER? I cry for your descend into the world of psychos. I really do. Sob.

Anyway, Hilary has been ignoring us on a daily basis, and it's hurting us really deep.
I think the reason is Joeee and her daily tease-the-Jerry-sessions.
You wouldn't believe the shit she comes up with. (Jerry the celery merry berry cherry etc.)
It'll make you wonder if you have an imaginary friend.
The next on the list of To-Do-Necessary-Acts-That-Make-Jerry-Give-Humorous-Reactions involves the making of Jerry's own music video.
Once again, I shed tears for her rapid descent into the world of chainsaw killers.
I'm waiting for the day Hilary turns homicidal and slaughters off half the population. I shall sit back and drink my Pokka green tea when that happens.
It will be a controversial visual feast, I gurantee.
Ok I think I said too much unintellectually stimulating things already.
Have to do more productive things. Like study for the 3 tests on Fri.
I still can't believe this. 3 on the same day. Mortifying!

Soldier._Destiny'sChild

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

I'm having a hissy fit for Mom refused to buy bandung for me.
I'm having this sudden pink fetish right now, and although the bandung pink is terribyl uglyy, I have this unspeakable craving for it.
Ugh i think I have been possessed.

School was hilarious today.
Chem prac. Cool ppts we had. Diarrhoea,algae and some oily purple solution.
Art was damn funny.
Lizzie was so entertaining.
Made SaWee,heidi and me laugh like nutters.
Felt rather accomplished, for I did smth productive while managing to entertain myself.
Cough. Vat the hell, right.
My Eng test was horrible. Passed on the dot. jwakdfjwkejtf0t3984
Stupido ninny questions. Can you believe it, they actually took the passage from the NGC mag. Interesting to read, but do? No way.
Ate at Heartland PizzaHut with Sawee and Heidi.
Very filling. Pile the fats! (Floats.)
Laughed like shit.
So kuku, everybody.
Hahha. I love my clique.

Alicia sent me 'True' by Ryan Cabrera.
:D Nice song. Fwahahha.
Played Bejeweled with Eva.
I suck at that game.
3 tests on Friday. Coincedence?
No i don't think so.


True._RyanCabrera

Monday, February 21, 2005

Hahaha.
Today is so FUNNY.
Saweee changed new specs. She looks un-kuku now.
That's not cool. Kuku sawee is funnier.
Art was like ....
Hadta pose with some other people so classmates can practice figure drawing.
It was kind of funny though.
Recess. I was staring at Joee's giant chicken leg.
And I got up and bought one for myself for the leg seemed too tempting.
On the way upta class, this impulsive phrase spoked itself.
'I'm a flowerrr'. There was a uncomfortable silence then pandemonium.
Yea, so started the fruit.flower.veggie craze.
I'm a cabbage. (Blame Joee and her kuku-ness.)
Joee is a lalang. (Dont ask me how that came about.)
Heidi is a turnip. ( She got demoted from a tulip)
SaWee is a poppy. ( Sawee the poppy. Resounds nicely!)
Partner is BRANDONTHEBENDAN PARSLEY. (Tralallaa.Loong story.)
Hilary is a celery. (Jerry the celery! Blame Joee and her gone brain.)
Hilary looked positively terrifying today, though. I wonder why.
And we are in the process naming the rest of the population.
I
nearly died of deep brain thrombosis.
All the energy used to laugh and so the heart stop beating for minutes and the blood starts to agglutinate and clot up the neurons.
Lit was the horriblest.
I was doing my work and doodling and paying attention when suddenly Joee goes into her dementia-moods again, and snatches my book and doddles shit in it.
I started laughing extremely hysterically, in the middle of class.
The stuff she wrote was so retarded. Or maybe it's my odd humour.
Anyway, I was so hysterical, Ms Kaur gave me a Stare.
Yea it happened for 4times. Hejing joined in the Make-Me-Choke-To-Death campaign too.
Imagine the crap that pours from those 2. Bless my poor soul. I was wheezing and guffawing.
My row thought I was kuku.
Ms Kaur was positively disturbed.
SEE LA JOEE, ALL YOUR FAULT AGAIN.
But you should really see some of the crap she writes. It was so HILARIOUS.

Math. Mrs Wong gave us angbaoss. With chocs inside. XD
I FAILED MY QUIZ. HAHAHA.
How uncool. But it was expected, so I shall not dwell on this.
Had a new quiz. It was tougher than the 1st. But I passed. Yayers.
Shows that I can do locus. (Flies around.)
TEST ON FRI ON ALL THE SHIT I CAN'T DO? O how depressing.
Anybody vant to tuition the pathetic hopeless me in math? (Sends out 'pity me' vibes)
Ooo i love the word vibes. It makes me so amused. I don't know why.
Ok back to the topic.
CHinese was boring as usual.
I'm noticing a trend in the poeple who don't do their hmk. They're always the same.
(Eg. Heidi and me.)
She and I were trying to self-amuse each other.
Were talking complete crap to each other.
My brain deteoriates with the company I'm with everyday. Help.
Her plan to make me pee backfired and she herself felt like peeing instead.
LOUSY. HAHA.
Chinese is so tedium la. Fwoosh.
Walked home after a drink.

I realise I have the inability of tying my hair straight.
It's so absurd, but my flaccid tail is NOT straight.
No it's not an indicator of my gender preferences nor is it an in-built electromagnetic compass, Heidi.
The more I think about it, the more retarded it sounds.
I think my hair is alive and rebellious.
How annoying.


MeAgainstTheMusic._BritneySpears

Sunday, February 20, 2005

Suddenly i know i'm not sleeping, hello, i'm still here

YumCha today.
Old man's back from HongKong.
Bahs. I wanted to go toos.
All the nice foods I missed.
O the horror!
Tuition.
Joee kept msging me all the Mulan 2 funny parts.
Make me laugh and laugh during tuition.
The teach looked like he wanted to throw the whiteboard eraser at me.
Classmates thought I was nutters.
JOEE YOU EVIL SADISTIC PIGGG.
Bahhh.
Lol bamboo shoots and duckweed. (CHOKES.)
You are seriously demented.

Ayee. I'm alone at home and I keep getting strange vibes.
I feel un-alone.
You know, and I'm quite scared.

Friday, February 18, 2005

I think i'm an very unfeeling person.
I don't get squealy and touched by sweet things.
In fact, I feel the opposite.
Especially about sweetness and sap.
It just irritates the beejeezus out of me.
And I'm very impassive about many things.
Take for example, the mortifying one I like.
I don't even care about what happens in her life, what she does, and such.
Really. I'm like whatever, it's her life, she does what she wants, and I do what I want.
I wonder if that is normal.
Sometimes, tidbits people tell me does pique my interest for like, 3 mins, and I realise I feel rather nonchalant about it, it's just a momentary curiosity.
Cough, short attention span.
But people don't believe me. How annoying. I feel maligned.

Also, if like my blog is displayed for all to see in school ( for content or whatsoever) , I'll be like, " Ooo that's mine ain't it?"
For if I dare to publish what I said, I already conveyed to people that I'm responsible for this and when I publish it, then I shouldn't be afraid of what people will do or think.
The world will never agree with you totally, so don't delude yourself.
So once you hit the publish button, you are telling the world that you think this way, and if they have a probelm with it, that's too bad.
You should shoulder your message and not shy away or deny it.
If you dared think that way and put it in words, you will account for your actions.
That's what I think. And I'll be very impassive if that really happens.
I don't see a need to fluster and scream and die of embarressment. Just tell the world you said that, for what you really feel is most important to you and only you understand.

Screwed up my Math quiz.
How horrid. No wonder I couldn't get the answers, I did the wrong procedure.
And the irony was that I finally figured out what's wrong when time's up.
Aye. Like 8 marks down the gutter. Ayeee.
Ah sure fail one.
Moans.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

I was almost late for school today.
Luckily, the bus decided to abide with my wishes and come 3 mins earlier.
Rawr. Close call, da ne?
Chinese test was fairly easy. Well the 1st page was fine. The next wasn't.
Geog. Half the of half of the class had show and tell.
Hahaha. Lizzie's one amused me greatly. She's so entertaining.
So was Hilary, me and Joee started chuckling, because it's Jerry.
Joee came up with this long long list of irrelevant middle names to accompany Hilary's name, for her mechanics needed repairs. I kind of pity you, Hilary.
But it was funny looking at Jerry's '......' reactions.
JERRY YOU'RE SO AMUSING. HAHA.

PE. Bloody fuuck. I died la, the ninny running. I need some serious oiling. It's not even 1km, but I already had breathing difficulties.
How lousy.
Played bball. Err, well I think it is still called bball.
You know the drill that follows.
I ate so much for recess. Burhh. Food will be the death of me one day.
Sushi buffet, jap food date, chocolate buffet and wedding dinner coming up.
I should be smiling sheepishly, but I shan't.
Food is just smth I can't shy away from, no matter what. HAHA.
I can't even think of dieting. I think I'll die in 2days.
Fats are quite useful, actually. They up your survival chances after being defenestrated by 0.1%.
Haha. What a pathetic attempt to console myself.

Continued with Show and Tell. What's the point, actually?
Show and Tell's for bean-sized kiddos. I'm bigger than beans.
Haha. I talked about roses. (I LIKE FLOWERS.:>)
The wilting rose that Sooo gave me for Vday.
Poor poor plant. I sincerely wish it a proper passing on.
Ninny classmates are telling me to relate it to love,death,myself and goths.
HAHA. How Cassandra! I'm not at her stage yet, my dears.
Die Lizzie! Hahaha. Lol I'm not going to share my dark and twisted thoughts with MrsNg. :P
Thanks for the suggestions though. I might entertain you one day.
Funny thang happened during PC.
Lizzie flew out of her chair or smth?
I was like O.o?!
Jeslyn was grabbing her legs or smth.
Damn funny. She literally flew to the other side of the class.
How fascinating, the dynamics of reflexes.

Macs for lunch with half the clique and Michelle Chia.
Michelle's nutzo. Like really, (does twirly whirly finger movement).
Ahh i'm surrounded by lunatics all the time. How mortifying. HAHA.
This accounts for a large percentage of my un-normalness.
Home.
Naruto episode 122 is out and I downloaded it!
Evil,evil cackle. XD
(Runs off in rabid fangirl mode.)


Hello._Evanescence

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Partner and I just redefine the term friendly banter.
It's our main form of communication in class and we were doing it during Geog.
Partner was so gay today. Both meanings covered.
I hope it irritated the teach. Muaahahha.
Anyway, I can't remember what i have to say.
How horrid, my STM.
I found out SaWeee is a prude, coz' i touched her and she shrieked like a harpy.
So funneh.
She disappeared somewhere on our way backta class.
Killjoy! Hahhaa.
(Evil smirk.) Just wait, SaWeee, i'm going to molest you someday!

Lunched the beautiful kway chap at Sgn Gardens. Nat and Jeanne came to sit with us and we made a big happy family. YAYs.
Realised my clique is really demented.
Joee loves Power Rangers and the moustache man from Nickelodeon.(sp?)She talks alot of crap.
Soooo laughs all the time, at completely unrelevant things. She talks crap too.
Heidi talks even more crap. It borders on schizophrenic-senseless-gibber-talk. And she's the Devil's Advocate.
SaWeee is the kuku-est of all. Haha. The lessest crap-talker in the clique, but nevertheless the funniest. So nice ta bully too, XDXD.
Partner is another mudd bitch. She talks alot of crap and we engage in arguments every period every day. And she's secretly girly, actually. :P
Of course, I'm not entirely sane either.
Who would with these people? :D

And they left me to fend for myself in the blistering heat of the cursed yellow spot in the sky!
Too many people to squish in the car, so I decided to sacriface my body and give them a chance. How noble of me.
HAHA. The walk back was horrifying. Damn the CYS, and it's heat.
I pray for rain and wind and snow or any other form of precipitate.
I shall go do the Rain Dance now.
TRALALAS.

Fighter._ChristinaAguilera

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

I SEE THINGS. Really. I was horrified.
Ytd was Valentine's, and thee didnt blog, coz' i was engrossed in PoT.
THANKS NAT! XDXD
Valentine's was great. Thee/thou received so many sweets and chocolates.
I sense a ultimate evil plot in the receival of such, but IT'S OK COZ' I'M FAT ALREADY.
Tralalala.
Was doing the last min touch ups on our presents, coz' Heidi came so late.
Who's the one who told me to come early hur?
BAH.

Heidi gave me a necklace. I gave her a ballooon. TRALALALA.
O i love our presents. HAHA. It's filled with JAPANESE SWEETS.
(Cough, it cost us quite a bomb,actually.)
KISS US, PUNY MORTALS! Damn I love japanese sweets. And you better too, or else.
SaWeeee gave me INCENSE. COOL. (floats around)
It smells so nice, i was in a perpeptually high mood ytd.
Food does wonders to me.
I was literally bouncing the whole day. Hahha.
Wanted to glomp random people at random times at random places.
Realised we made so many extra presents.
So we gave them to many random people. HAHA.
Lizzie, thanks for the egging on by the way, :P.
Random people dont feel upset, coz' you have JAPANESE SWEETS and JAPANESE SWEETS make you HAPPY and GIGGLY. GAYNESS ABOUNDS.
Ok I'm still high, as you can see, for I watched Constantine today, and Balthazar(?) was a sexy fiend. Me and Soo were ogling.

The nice bag of stuff is sitting happily in the fridge now, and i can't bear to eat it.
They must be cheering. I can almost hear them trumpeting in triumph for not being digested.
I think there were magic mushrooms in the LJS i consumed just now.
Ooo Constatine was interesting. Lucifer amuses me.
Took neos today at PS. They have gorgeous machines now.
Nice. God i love my clique. Funny people and utter retardation abounds.
I'm really ectastic now.
Ohno.
Maybe i'm possessed.
Mortifying,yes?

BIO TEST TMR. RAWR.

ElephantLoveMedley._MOulinRougeOST

I SEE THINGS. Really. I was horrified.
Ytd was Valentine's, and thee didnt blog, coz' i was engrossed in PoT.
THANKS NAT! XDXD
Valentine's was great. Thee/thou received so many sweets and chocolates.
I sense a ultimate evil plot in the receival of such, but IT'S OK COZ' I'M FAT ALREADY.
Tralalala.
Was doing the last min touch ups on our presents, coz' Heidi came so late.
Who's the one who told me to come early hur?
BAH.

Heidi gave me a necklace. I gave her a ballooon. TRALALALA.
O i love our presents. HAHA. It's filled with JAPANESE SWEETS.
(Cough, it cost us quite a bomb,actually.)
KISS US, PUNY MORTALS! Damn I love japanese sweets. And you better too, or else.
SaWeeee gave me INCENSE. COOL. (floats around)
It smells so nice, i was in a perpeptually high mood ytd.
Food does wonders to me.
I was literally bouncing the whole day. Hahha.
Wanted to glomp random people at random times at random places.
Realised we made so many extra presents.
So we gave them to many random people. HAHA.
Lizzie, thanks for the egging on by the way, :P.
Random people dont feel upset, coz' you have JAPANESE SWEETS and JAPANESE SWEETS make you HAPPY and GIGGLY. GAYNESS ABOUNDS.
Ok I'm still high, as you can see, for I watched Constantine today, and Balthazar(?) was a sexy fiend. Me and Soo were ogling.

The nice bag of stuff is sitting happily in the fridge now, and i can't bear to eat it.
They must be cheering. I can almost hear them trumpeting in triumph for not being digested.
I think there were magic mushrooms in the LJS i consumed just now.
Ooo Constatine was interesting. Lucifer amuses me.
Took neos today at PS. They have gorgeous machines now.
Nice. God i love my clique. Funny people and utter retardation abounds.
I'm really ectastic now.
Ohno.
Maybe i'm possessed.
Mortifying,yes?

BIO TEST TMR. RAWR.

ElephantLoveMedley._MOulinRougeOST

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Just came back from town with Eva and Shalini.
Muahahaa.
I skipped tuition to day just to get some last minute touch ups.
And i realised vday gifts are so expensive.
alkfjsklajf093=uq[54u9jfkejgwk'a
NO MONEY NOW. POOR POOR ME.
PS first. SAW JESLYN AND HER FRIEND!
Hahaha. She dragged us down to say 'Happy Bdae' to Evon.
And started talking crap about me and Lizzie. WTH?!
:PP
Wenta spotlight to get some nice wrapping ideas and tags.
Spent 10bucks just on the tags only? Bah.
Eva is so nice.
She gave me a billion chocs. HAHA.
YAY.
Walked around the whole of town from PS looking for suitable stuff.
Ayee.
You people better LOVE me. BAH.
Ate dinner at Hougang Mall, for town is so crowded that we almost died waiting for a table.
Talked about certain matters, and I got emotional overload.
Hell, I was teetering on an emotional breakdown.
Funny thing is, it isn't even my probelm.
I was so disturbed and angry and murderous. (PMS)
It always made me behave weirdly, that shitty menses.
Cabbed home.
I feel very queasy now, bah.

Friday, February 11, 2005

RANT.

I think too much.
Excessively, and it hurts my head when things get, well, too thought of.
It doesn't help that i have a vivid iridescent imagination.
That can potentially scar one mentally, trust me.
Actually, I think i'm too twisted to actually be really scarred anymore.
I think too deep too.
The habit of reading people has gone too far, it's now ingrained into me.
So I subconciously receive vibes and reactions from people and then analyze their; moods-personality-perspective.
It's a frigging bother, please, as the word subconciously tells you that it may occur without my immediate realisation, and the analyzing processes continue to happen and I get sensory overloads sometimes.
Simply, it leads to paranoia and excessive contemplation.
But given a choice i wouldn't ever give this up, for knowing others and yourself will save your hide in this world, where malice and deception is everywhere, and naivette will be your ultimate downfall.

Also, to clarify things, I don't miss her insanely all the time, like some pathetic snivelling deluded individual.
Sure there are times, but it is not a time-consuming, attention-grabbing, soul-consuming loneliness. It is barely even noticeable most of the time;
it just is there, quiet and background.
It usually shows up only when i'm tired and irritated from mindgames or other things.
Rar. I'm extremely complex and paradoxical, and please don't stereotype me with the rest of the admirers, for being maligned is the worst possible feeling to be ever graced upon.

It is mortifying to know that even if I can get out of this sickening shit, she has still been in my life for half my life, since the time i knew her.
I don't know why, but I start curling and bristling when that dawns on me.
Hey I kind of used another 1/5 of my life falling and trying to haul myself out for her.
Mortifying,yes? Nevermind if you don't get my mentality, for it's difficult even for me to grasp it.
You know, I get this distinct feeling that I could have used this time to do something more useful, like this or that, instead of trying to save my dignity and myself.
MORTIFYING.
Ah yes, as a sidenote, my stupido thinking and personality evolved into the tangled mess it is because of this. Wonderful,no?
Hur but i guess that does have it's perks.

For you must know your past to know yourself. You must know your past to know your future. There are these things, these reasons, for why you cannot allow yourself to forget, because to forget is to ignore, and to ignore is to allow weakness in yourself. To ignore yourself is to deny yourself and to deny the world.
Whoosh understood that logic? It looks kind of digressed hur?
Err, just understand the concept la.

I always talk about recurring topics don't I?
XD It's an ubiquitous matter.
O well, as long as I don't get over the whole situation, I will keep mulling over this ninny thing. Wish me luck, I have bad foreboding feeling that this will continue for another,period of time?
O about my previous entry, I was high-ing on a tribute to ramen song.(what crack are the creators up on?)
Yes such a thing exists, and I went psychedelic for a while.

Frar-lalalalalalalala.

Ode to ramen!


MyImmortal._Evanescence

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Chinese New Year.
Ah delightful season of collecting money without being accused of extortion or whatever petty crimes listed in the Book of the Law.
What better to do than go around taking advantage of this?
Sadly my mom doesn't think so, she's lazy and i only collected 10reds in 2 days.
What a incorrigible thing to do.
Yes I'm a rotten money-minded woman, and I know it.
Tralalala.
Must use your surroundings to your advantage, that's a life lesson all must learn.
Cough, and this is an application.
O well I think I ranted too much crapshit.
Jaa ne sa.

And my delightful layout. Rock Leee~ :P
Watch Naruto, people.

Saturday, February 05, 2005

The photobucket thingy exceeded.
So look at this layout.
Ah whatever. I'm lazy and i dont feel like doing anything.
Naruto rocks, i have to say.
It totally roxors.

Friday, February 04, 2005

I laughed so much today. ( though LD was a killjoy as usual)
That ninny Hilary and her orange seed spitting.
Uncivilised behaviour.
But she is so funny i can't stand it. JERRY YOU'RE SO FUNNY!
And she did smth really evil today.
I was shocked to the ends of the earth. O.O

And we got penalised for CNY deco, coz' Weewee wrote a word wrongly.
Anguished scream. kjfksaj;dkl;jlksjgopwu4eaj0-i3
4A2's class is SO nice. BLOODY. : P

Ooo, and the hawker near ChompChomp, sells fabulous kway chap. XD
ChompChomp stingray is so beautiful, anyway. SO BEAUTIFUL. (dies.)
O i love food.


Everybody'sFool._Evanescence
Have i told you how much i love Evanescence? I love them,so much. ROCKS.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

My nerves are frazzly again.
I get this distinct melancholy now for no reason.
It happens all the time, much to my dismayal, it's unfathomable, unpredictable.
I feel alot. I get vibes from everything. That's why I need emotion dampers, or i'll have a breakdown everytime it occurs.
That's why i'm so indifferent to certain things which should affect me.
It's all connected and linked to my method of analogy.
It's rather distressing.
For if something goes haywire, the rest follows.
I needed to say that out. For the cycle has been disrupted.

Did class deco today.
School was typical today.
I don't remember much actually.
Evanescence is nice.

Everybody'sFool._Evanescence

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Naruto manga chpt 245 is out!
O MY I WAITED FOR ALMOST A MONTH.
Naruto looks damn hot now.
It's very funny, this Part2 thang.
Can't wait for the rest to come out.
My heart is trepidating at alarming rates.

Sch. Hmm.
Assembly was interesting.
Those friendster photos got caught. (Very amusing. I was laughing at the fakeness.)
The people got dp and suspension.
But i dont feel that the school did anything wrong, though the suspension is so long.
Hahah. I'm quite impressed by the stupidity (or audacity?) of the people though.
I mean, it's far from private.
Teachers even have accounts, so it's quite senseless to post it on Friendster.
owell, personal opinion.
Our school practices bigotry anyway.
Bah. So much for the Penal Code thang.
Well I don't appreciate others calling such matters as aberrations.
Again, matter of perspective and such.
Defamation was talked about too.
Actually i'm so impassive about the whole defamation thing, as it's so unlikely for us to sue others.
Not at our age la. Lawyer fees, the court room fees, etc; is like whoa.
Anyway, the amount you get even if you win would probably go into paying those fees.
So, too bad.

And because of forementioned presentation, we missed Chem prac. My iodine gas!
Art was damn funny.
The teach is very knowledgeable. VERY.
We had this bio lesson thang today, but he was so retarded.
Ah well. Give and take i presume.
He wants us to copy Mondrain's art style for our plant. What please!
Hnn.
Got 24.5/30 for Geog.
Giant shock, for i really have no idea how it'll be. But it's satisfying though. Muahaha. (gloats)
It's relieving to see that i have common sense, despite my violent dislike of Human Geog. It's boring. It's pointless. Ok not really. It's uninteresting.
Physical Geog, oh the other hand,is so riveting.
And i can't pronounce many words in my descriptive essay. Go figure. Only I can pull off something like that.

After school went to Macs. Two times. Because I have dementia.
Second time with the Hester,Ste,Partner and Jan.
Crapfest abounds.
Stef is so funny. She told us so many funny things. I was laughing like nuts.
Learnt a new word from her: mundgen.
I wouldn't tell you the meaning. :P
Cabbed home with them. Muahaha.
Now im moneyless.
Hurr.